Death of an Estranged Parent, Long Time, No Blog

I had stopped writing before because I felt I didn’t have a lot more to say.  I also went through a very difficult neighbor situation, she was threatening and eventually violent.  Around the same time, I was laid off from my job as the company wasn’t doing well and had to find another job.   I apologize for not responding to the comments from then sooner and I will be going through them.  Both of those situations have improved a lot.

My likely narcissist mother died earlier this month.  I regret that things weren’t different so that there wasn’t an estrangement.  I DO NOT REGRET protecting myself and refusing to submit myself to additional abuse.  I have had to deal with some flying monkeys, but other than that, I’m doing ok all things considered.  I have a lot to process now and I’ll be writing about it.

Faux/Forced Forgiveness

Ok, as some of you may know, I’m not all that fond of the “forgiveness police” who decide it’s up to them to dictate to the people who have been wronged as to how and when to forgive. Or that people should forget or give people multiple second chances to people who will prove time and tim again and again and again that they will only kick you in the teeth pretty much every chance they get. That said, I think the most recent episode of American Horror Story: Asylum did an excellent job of illustrating the pitfalls of faux/forced forgiveness. Don’t read any more of this if you haven’t watched this episode, as it contains spoilers Continue reading “Faux/Forced Forgiveness”

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

‘Tis (or has been) evaluation season at work.  Sometimes I get very nice comments in email from people I do work for at my job.  I’ll include them as part of my evaluation.  This year I received one calling me a “godsend” and another a “genius”.  I couldn’t bring myself to include them in my evaluation, though I did eventually end up passing them along to my boss as praise for the department (that’s how I worded the email where I forwarded them. Continue reading “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall”

Dream Diary: Sibling Grief and Feelings

I woke up at 3:30 this morning from a dream. I felt a strong sense of both grief and panic upon awakening. The dream was about a brother who’d lost a sister. But I didn’t recognize the brother. He wasn’t anyone I knew, he wasn’t anyone famous. He didn’t even look like the young tourist guy I was helping with directions during my commute home, which would have made sense in that dream omelette sort of way.

Continue reading “Dream Diary: Sibling Grief and Feelings”