Whenthescapegoatquits's Blog

A Blog about scapegoat recovery & daughters of narcissistic mothers

Archive for the ‘Alcoholism’ Category

The Myth that Women Don’t Abuse People

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on November 1, 2011

I was reading a news story when I came across this link of Top Ten signs You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship.  Out of the 10 slides used to illustrate abusive behavior, all either feature an adult man as abuser and/or an adult woman as victim.  It uses masculine nouns/pronouns for the abuser and feminine for the victim.  The NEXT TO LAST slide acknowledges that women might also be abusers.  Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Healing & Recovery, narcissism, Parents with Personality Disorders, Personality Disorders, RANT, Scapegoat, Scapegoating, Shaming | 4 Comments »

Grudges, Forgiveness & Eviction

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on September 27, 2011

A good friend of mine posted a photo on Facebook with a sign of that famous saying, “Holding a Grudge is Like Letting Someone Live Rent Free in your head.”  I jokingly replied that some people are harder to evict than others.  Which got me thinking about the expression and all of the area in between it. 

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Posted in Alcoholism, Healing & Recovery, Parents with Personality Disorders, Personality Disorders, Pithy Platitude Parsing, Scapegoat, Shaming | 5 Comments »

Two Standards?

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on August 10, 2011

It may seem at times like I go much easier on my father than my mother when it comes to the past.  This may seem unfair because after all, he contributed to the discord, violence and disharmony at home when I was a child.  Both parents were alcoholics while I was growing up.  Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Healing & Recovery, Scapegoat, Scapegoating | 2 Comments »

Feelings, Nothing More (or less) than Feelings

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on August 22, 2009

Sorry, if I get a chance to use a bad 70s song as a title, I’m going for it.  Don’t try to stop me!  🙂  I have been doing a lot of thought/work on feelings as part of therapy lately.   So feelings, both mine & others are on my mind a lot lately. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Scapegoating, Shaming | Leave a Comment »

Families in Denial

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on August 22, 2009

The Mayor of Milwaukee was leaving the state fair this weekend when he came across a woman screaming for help/to call 911.  As he did, he was attacked by the man who had been threatening the woman.  He was in an argument with his baby’s grandmother.  For his bravery, the mayor was beaten with the man’s fists and a metal stick.  Thankfully, he is recovering and there were no serious brain injuries.  Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Scapegoating | Leave a Comment »

Taconic Tragedy & Scapegoating

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on August 9, 2009

A few weeks ago a woman driving a minivan with 5 children (her own 2, plus 3 nieces) in it collided with a SUV with 3 men on the Taconic Parkway.  The minivan was going the wrong way in the left lane.  Both drivers and all but a 5 year old boy in the minivan (the driver’s son) were killed.  He is recovering in the hospital & expected to survive.  A third car was involved in the accident, but the driver and the passenger survived.  Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Scapegoat, Scapegoating, Shaming | Leave a Comment »

My Brother’s Keeper Part 2

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on July 12, 2009

I thought about this some more and I realized I had a harder time letting go of my brother than I did with letting go of my mother.  I’m thinking over the reasons for this.  Part of it was the way she flat out told me she wasn’t going to change when I asked her to stop doing or saying certain things which were hurting me.  That made it easier. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Alcoholism, Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, narcissism | Leave a Comment »

Truth Telling, Scapegoating & Shaming

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on July 12, 2009

With my new found awareness of scapegoating in mind, I’ve been doing some research on the subjects of scapegoating and shaming of truth tellers. 

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Posted in Alcoholism, Scapegoat, Scapegoating | 15 Comments »

My Brother’s Keeper

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on July 11, 2009

One of the things which has come up in both therapy & the AlAnon meetings I’ve attended is that you can’t control what other people do and that you need to look at your own motivations for control.  As I was putting away some laundry today, I thought about that in relation to my brother. 

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Posted in Alcoholism, Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, narcissism, Scapegoat, Scapegoating | 2 Comments »

Independence Day

Posted by whenthescapegoatquits on July 11, 2009

 

Last weekend I got to spend some time with my dad’s brother’s side of the family.  I had a nice time and I got a lot of good feedback and answers both intellectually and emotionally.  And it was nice to have a family event where the fireworks pictured were the only fireworks!   This one’s a very long post, in fact, I think it may be longer than the actual Revolutionary War, so go get a cup of coffee, herbal tea, etc & get comfy! 🙂

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Posted in Alcoholism, Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, narcissism, Scapegoat, Scapegoating | 2 Comments »